I realize as I wrote the title just now that it might be misconstrued as a political post perhaps…indeed strange times when I look at that scene but alas, this is quite a bit more eg0centric than political.
All. About. Me. And. Mahlia
Strange times they are. I spent the day looking at the clock wondering how long it would take for 3pm to get here. I did things that have been on a “to do” list for literally over 12 months but I’ve been putting off because I never get more than 5 minutes of uninterrupted time each day so I use that strictly for bathroom breaks only or a quick returned phone call or friend texting session. But today my precious Mahlia was in her second day of all-day kindergarten and strangely Brady and Ainsley seemed to want nothing to do with me for the first few hours of their day, as they sweetly played (not quite together but in close proximity SO well). So, I organized, baked, meal planned, made the grocery list and a few other lists, wrote letters, sold a few items and mailed a package of items left at our house Christmas 2014. (Warning: Do NOT leave things at my house…clearly I’m a bad returner). I glanced at the clock, 9:30am!! Seriously what now?
It’s been 2 full days of kindergarten and I feel like such a baby! Mahlia is LOVING it so far! (Phew!) I am so thankful for that! I have really been unsure how she would react. She has kept me guessing as to what to expect from her because she’s not completely consistent in her reactions to new things or school-related things. She will love something one day and hate it the next. She’ll be miss independent and all about sitting down and working on something patiently one day and sobbing over me not doing everything for her the next day. But, she’s currently on an independent and confident kick. She even asked to walk herself to school alone! Of course the answer was NO WAY! She doesn’t realize how much the separation has affected me, which I’m thankful for, but I’m still shocked by just how rocked I am.
When she was 3, a.k.a the three-nAger, as we liked to describe her then, I seriously thought school was eons away. I thought my two hours of MOPs each week were a glorious vacation from what felt like 3-year-old hormone raging tantrums and attitude problems. I had friends talking about homeschool and I thought they were C-R-A-Z-Y! Now I find myself glancing at homeschool curriculums online once or twice a day just because I’m curious and incredibly jealous that Mahlia’s teacher sees more of her than I do. I know that all of this is somewhat ‘normal’ change, and that it’s positive for her and probably for all of us, but wow, I had no idea it was this hard! I miss my girl! I’m looking forward to back-to-school-night and learning more about what her day entails since she’s not the most verbose kid. She did proudly tell me today about playing with a new friend! I didn’t get tons of details, but they sat by eachother at lunch, went swinging at recess, and practiced being “monkeys” on the play fire engine. All great friendly activities making my heart smile! She then walked me to her backpack and pulled out a dime that said friend gave her. (Was this really a gift? Did friend give it or drop it when given change for her lunch and it was ‘given’ from being snatched off the ground? Am I supposed to send this back to school with a note or just let it go? No idea! So much to learn!) Mahlia also shared about PE and art class and watching a show for “indoor recess” during the rain today. As you can tell she is all about structure, numbers and literacy! Ha! I’m thankful that my prayers for her to go love others well and find a love for school are being answered in these first days already. She’s excited for each day and ready to go. I just need to keep working on letting go as she walks into the building each day.
The volume, rhythm, dynamic and sheer numbers in our house are very different during the day and soon to be different still when Brady starts Pre-K and Ainsley preschool! I will have one 3hr morning a week by myself with NO schedule and no kids! What is that like? I don’t think it’s all bad really but it’s going to take a serious adjustment in my mind and heart to get used to. I feel so blessed to have been home for these past 4 years now watching Mahlia, Brady and Ainsley grow. What a gift! Love my job! Miss my girl!